B is for Bra
It occurred to me today as I completed Day 3 of Week 1 of the Couch to 5K plan how horribly important a proper exercise bra can be.
One would think that this epiphany would have taken place ages ago with far less effort. After all, I learned very quickly after the onset of puberty that I was no longer able to ride to school in the back of the bus without suffering black eyes from the uncontrollable response of my new golden bozos to every pothole, rock, and insect the bus happened to roll over. I’ve always had to purchase the fugly over-the-shoulder-boulder-holders with the underwire and thick straps which no amount of lace or other embellishments could hide the overwhelming fact that they were clearly not make to be worn by any woman under the age of 150. And, BTW, what is up with Victoria’s Secret (of ALL the companies in the universe) not offering pretty bras in sizes to accommodate my Winnebagos? C’mon, Victoria! Where’s the love?
Why I thought that just any old brightly colored spandex band with thick straps could possibly contain the girls while I ran (ok, jogged) my little heart out, I’ll never know. Not only could I not concentrate on my workout due to the exaggerated motion of my bodacious ta-tas and fear of being seen causing myself bodily harm with them, I grew tired much more quickly.
So, I now pledge to never again forsake my orange Reebok high impact jog bra under any circumstances. I urge all my ladies to do the same and never relinquish your boobs to the uncaring manipulations of gravity during your workouts.